Welcome brother. I've been up all night so will start small and may come back later.

Consider: What does being a satanist mean to you? Are you seeking a higher purpose and power to lift yourself. Do you desire to oppose something you hate? Do you seek to divorce morals from rules, such that you set your own moral standards rather than having them imposed by a higher power? There could be many other motivations, so for others to assist you in achieving goals you need to know what they are, and be able to convey them. 11